A page in our book of memories, has gently turned today. 

Thinking of you today Chrissy and I pray your loved ones

    are comforted by loving memories and God's Peace.

DEAREST CHRISSY;

                 TODAY IS JUST ANOTHER DAY,TOMORROW A GUESS, BUT YESTERDAY, OH' DEAR GOD FOR ONE MORE YESTERDAY, WHEN OUR FAMILY WAS WHOLE AND MY HEART FULL WITH HAPPINESS,HOPES AND DREAMS FOR YOUR FUTURE. MARRIAGE A HOST OF CHILDREN THAT YOU ALWAYS WANTED,YOUR DISIRE TO ALWAYS HELP ALL THOSE LESS FORTUNATE THEN YOU,HUMAN OR THE 4 LEGGED KIND IT DIDN,T MATTER YOU ALWAYS SACRIFICED FOR THOSE WHO NEEDED YOU.

                CHRISSY I NEED YOU NOW SO VERY MUCH, MY LIFE IS DIFFERENT NOW,SADNESS, DISPAIR RULE MY DAYS( WHICH IS JUST ANOTHER DAY) MY TOMORROWS ARE EMPTY AND DREAMLESS. OH' DEAR GOD I LONG FOR THOSE YESTERDAYS. I LOVE YOU LITTLE ONE

Hoping you have a wonderful day in our heavens above!!

DEAREST CHRISSY;

   JUST SOME WORDS TO LET YOU KNOW WHATS IN MY HEART TODAY AFTER ALMOST 2 YEARS THAT MY PROUD LITTLE BIRD FLEW FREE.

   NO FAREWELL WORDS WERE SPOKEN,

   NO TIME TO SAY GOODBYE,

   YOU WERE GONE BEFORE WE KNEW IT

   AND ONLY GOD KNOWS THE REASON WHY

   MY HEART STILL ACHES WITH SADNESS

   AND MANY TEARS STILL FLOW AND FLOW

   WHAT IT MEANT TO LOSS YOU,

   NO ONE COULD OR WILL EVER KNOW.     

THERE IS SO MUCH MORE I WANT TO SAY OR DO BUT NOTHING WILL CHANGE WHAT IS AND I CAN'T FIX IT LIKE I SHOULD I'M SO VERY SORRY BABY GIRL, PLEASE FORGIVE ME

                   I LOVE YOU  XXX DADDY

In my thoughts & prayers on this

4th of July holiday & always.

Love,

Judy~Jamie-leigh's mom

My Dearest Chris,

I know you are always around, I feel you here, but lately I know you've really been around.  There are so many things going on and things I want to talk to you about.. I know you are trying to tell me what to do but Im just not sure.  I know some of the things I do you don't agree with, but I know you understand Why.  I Miss you so much and would do anything to have just one more second with you, But I think we all feel that way.  I guess until the day I can Finally be with you again.. that won't change.  I know you are finally happy and I am happy for you, but I need you to help me make it through until we can be together. Please stay close to me and help show me what to do.  I LOVE YOU & MISS YOU more than I could ever express in words.. FLY FREE MY SWEET ANGEL...  UNTIL WE MEET AGAIN..   HAPPY 23rd ANNIVERSARY IN HEAVEN!! I LOVE YOU!!  XOXOXOXO

Always,

Your Dearest Di

Chrissy,

I'm lifting your Dad in my prayers for Father's Day.

Hugs to your family, Cindy

HI CHRISSY;

               YOU KNOW I DON'T WRITE VERY WELL BUT I JUST WANTED TO TELL YOU A COUPLE OF THINGS, FIRST THAT I MISSED YOU ON SUNDAY WHEN LUKE WAS BAPTIZED, EVERYTHING IS SO DIFFERENT.THEN FATHERS DAY IS COMING AND I HATE FATHERS DAY. I READ SOMEWHERE THAT( A DAY OF SORROW IS LONGER THEN A MONTH OF JOY ) SINCE YOU LEFT I'VE GONE THROUGH DECADES OF MISERY, HELP US TO GET BETTER,I WISH I COULD TALK TO YOU AGAIN,  I WISH TO MANY THINGS WHICH CAN NEVER BE.

          I KNOW I'M RAMBLING BUT THATS WHAT I DO NOW RAMBLE.COME BY AND SAY HELLO BABY ...........GOODNITE DAD

I know you miss your Chrissy.  I know that you have treasure chest full of memories in your heart.  Pull each one out and relive  Chrissy.

There is no greater joy than the birth of a child there is no greater sorrow that the loss of that child to death.

May Chrissy's memories keep you smiling and full of joy

God Bless you

My Sweet Chrissy,

We worked on your garden today and it really looks beautiful... It is something I know we would have made together...  I can see us walking around the property talking about what we were going to do, Ripping out bushes and cutting things down.. I replay all the stuff we used to do outside together.. You were not positive what to do but all I had to do is give you a lopper and tell you where to go and you were busy for hours.. I really miss you doing all this stuff with me.  I know you are around and you are always sending us signs...  We are always looking for them..  Have a beautiful day on heaven..  FLY FREE AND SMILE MY SWEET ANGEL... UNTIL WE MEET AGAIN...  I LOVE YOU ALWAYS & FOREVER...

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO

Always,

Your Dearest Di

Dear Chrissy,

Time continues to move forward, and yet my heart & soul are left behind. I watch the flowers blooming, listen to the birds singing, and my tears flow as I know you should be here celebrating the beauty of life. I promise you Chrissy, I will work to find a cure for the illness that took you away from us. I know you continue to send us messages of love, but Oh how I long to hold you in my arms, see your beautiful face and hear your sweet voice. I'm trying so hard to move forward, as I watch your nephew Luke grow and bring joy to all the family. I know you visit him and he knows you, but please watch over him always, and stay close to the family, giving them strength to go through life with peace & happiness.

Chrissy, I long to see you, and I wait till we can hold eachother again. Be happy angel, fly free and give mama, papa, papu and grandpa a kiss for me. Until we meet again, Always, Mom

To My Sweet,

Somehow, I have made it through my birthday this year.. Again.   Also, making it through all the holidays and events that continue to pass,  But always remain empty.  I miss you soo much & wish everyday that there was some way to change everything... turn back time, but I know I can't.  I finally got my pendant with your picture and now I can carry your picture right near my heart, where you always are.  Stay near us all and help us to get through every day without you.  Happy 21 month Anniversary in Heaven.. FLY FREE MY SWEET ANGEL..  UNTIL WE CAN FINALLY BE TOGETHER AGAIN. 

I LOVE YOU ALWAYS & FOREVER.

Always,

Di

Linda & Mario,

In the worst of times we meet and a enduring friendship is formed.

I know that you know EXACTLY what I am feeling. As I was told early on by a bereaved father: We have been drafted into a club that  no one would willingly ever join.

I HATE this altered life. I do not want to disrespect my husband, daughter, 3 sons (one in heaven) and my loving family & friends because you all do mean so very, very much to me and I am enriched by all of you....but the me that I am now is not at peace without my angel Adam. As I attempted to take my life in January 28, 2007 it was not from lack of love or caring for all of you, I needed to stop my pain, I needed to let Craig father our children here on Earth and me to continue to Mother, protect and be with Adam.

Fast forward now to almost April 2008, which would have been your 26th birthday, so many holidays, so many new events in our lives (births, deaths, changes...) how can they all be happening without you here on Earth to share it with us?

It is such a struggle to breathe without our precious angels Linda & Mario. Why are we not dying of broken hearts? Why was my sincere attempt to join Adam denied to me? We move forward like Zombies in a movie, not in this world fully and not knowing what world we are in. Maybe it just is the world of grief, a place where you can never feel comfortable.

When we see the signs from our babes it is such a blessing and each little gift lifts the veil of grief ever so slightly then the veil drapes over us again and leaves us in darkness.

We are accomplishing more than we were in the early days of this new life....and yet it seems to be like acting in a play...we are playing who we are Linda, Mario, Paula, Craig and yet we feel like marionettes going through the motions.

I go to Adam's grave and SCREAM....NOOOOOOOno,no,no, give him back to me, whole, healthy and take me instead. No one needs to know .. God you can do it..make it that I died on Sept. 6th 2006.

We are told to accept, there is a reason, and so on. I know that the 4 of us want so badly to believe that this is true and at the same time fear that it is not. Our intense pain, the fall into the abyss of our loss, is a powerful force of it's own making every step painful...is it one more step away from our child's life or one step closer to being reunited with them? Maybe it is both?

I can't stand watching Craig suffer, watching you two suffer and seeing the destruction of our families and now the reconstruction of a altered family (good blessings GOD Bless Baby Luke). It's like living in quick sand, you never know what moment is going to be unbearable and pull you down or what moment you can stand but so unsteady. It's not a comfortable way to live.

Why couldn't our precious angels have been relieved of their suffering and still be with us on Earth? Time & distance from them tugs at our hearts and the fear of time robbing us of our memories is ever present.

I know that we will continue to support each other in any way that we can. I know that wherever life takes us we will always be connected through Chrissy & Adam.

You have dived headfirst into Chrissy's Wish and your efforts & sacrifices have to make a difference in this world. Craig & I admire you so for being able to hold it together and create something so purposeful in the most extreme challenged times in your lives.

Your friend in grief,

Paula